Ameri Grows from a Toddler to a Kindergartener

Ameri's life with Grandma Lilya continues. By the time she is seventeen months old, however, she is beginning to put a real crimp in Lilya's style and styling. Ameri has been passed around to friends and acquaintances. She has experienced some good care and some not so good care. There is some talk that she has been used in ways that are just not conventional. She has been with older kids and questionable adults. There has been no intervention from any governmental family service agencies and if anything has gone on it has been kept quiet. But, clearly Lilya is not too happy with the way things are going and the obvious behavioral manifestations she has seen in Ameri.

Lilya is acquainted with a couple that she knows from a church group connection and she gets wind that they are looking to adopt a child. They have boys but they want a girl. Lilya finds a way to approach Bob and Diane and to present them with an opportunity. So as to not get bogged down in details we will say that a deal is struck and Ameri is handed over in a relatively unsupervised adoption proceeding that was handled by an attorney and a judge.

Ameri goes to live with Bob, Diane and the boys. We must imagine the joy they must have felt that they were getting such a beautiful child. She has golden ringlets of hair. She has kissable cheeks and she is overwhelmed by so much attention. Bob and Diane love sweet little things. After they were through having the boys, they filled in their nurturing needs with exotic pets and toy animals of various species. But, now, here they have a beautiful child. The camera never stops. Diane loves to dress Ameri up and off they go to the photographers studio for a shoot. I have some of those pictures. Ameri is a doll. She is just sweet and perfect in every picture. In time, though, the effect of birth circumstances and early care begin to show their results. Ameri begins to act out in strange ways and displays motions and activities that are at first puzzling and then as they are to be understood become disturbing. Bob and Diane find that they need to seek professional help for Ameri.

Ameri's behavior and habits become more and more disturbing. She does not seem to want to accept affection, nor does she seem in any way to be attached to Bob and Diane except for when food or treats are involved. The boys have doted on little Ameri. They play with her and watch out for her. They share their treats with Ameri. Still, there seems to be only a tenuous bond with her new brothers. Children seen to have one level of expectation with each other and quite another with parent figures. This is especially pronounced with Ameri. She has rejected all of Diane's motherly overtures and she is even hostile to her at times. That hostility shows itself by screaming and running away from Diane. It also come out in distinctly destructive or hurting acts that are targeted at precious mementos, pictures and family pets. The professional visits ramp up in frequency. As Ameri gets on to her third year she is really starting to show her stuff.
Between age three and four, Ameri is placed out in daycare and therapeutic respite centers. As she moves toward her fifth year she is in pre-kindergarten and then kindergarten. She is a hand full every where. She is accepted for a while and then has to move on. She is not an easy child to manage. When she is with other children with marginal problems, a dynamic arises that causes the allied behaviors to be greater than the sum of the parts. Now, Ameri must experience her first hospitalization.